.senyum la pulak.

selepas melepaskan perasaan di entri di bawah nie, aku nk tukar lak cite. asyik2 semua pasal bnda x puas ati, bile plak aku nk snyum kn? nk list perkara yg buat aku tersenyum spjg minggu lps? aku menulis sume ini smbil mndengar Chatetan Konkerit by Akta Angkasa, beautiful.

1. My Short Term Memory da launch EP akhirnye. aku suke Lepaq Cafe nie. ambience yg best. maybe lagi best dari lepak Rasta. aku x berjaya dapatkan one copy EP diorg sbb da abis. kecewa sket la. tp Hana kate diorg akn reproduce lagi bnda tu. so, aku tnggu je la. hahaha. Congrats Hana, Muiz, Ujay, Mushi dan Wan. =)

2. BOLD maybe band yg cukup best gile. tapi sorry la hardcore fans, aku x layan sngt diorg. aku cenderung lagi nak dengar Toe, ENVY, Barcelona, Raein, Kias Fansuri dan Furniture. biarpun nama di myspace aku da jadi xEJx, x bermakna aku kna layan lagu hardcore spjg masa kn? however, congrats kat Breakin' Chains. show di BOLD itu hari cukup superb. aku juga tersnyum sbb Mommucks bg aku the honour to announce to the crowd their cover song.

"ok ok. ntuk cover song kitorg, ape kate kite tanya Kak Aina kite, nk cover lagu mana?" kata Mommucks smbil mnghalakan mic kat aku.

"WAKE THE DEAD by Comeback Kid!!!"

and the crowd went crazy.

3. tiga hari berturut aku ke Rasta, kawan aku pun da ckp aku nie nak jadi poser perasan kelas atasan. kepala hotak mereka. poser mane brani pakai tshirt "Spore is a Fine City" atao tshirt Job For A Cowboy (yg disalah anggap sbg band black metal) prgi sane. hahaha. 1st day aku pegi sbb nk melepak ngn housemates aku. lama gile aku x keluar melepak ngn Ummi, Ama, Yan dan Adeeq. di sana, jumpe pulak ngn Ejal and officemates diorg. malam tu aku balik tersenyum. 2nd day, aku ke sane selepas gig BOLD di One Cafe dan Unleashed the Anger II di Equal Studio. saje2 boring sblum btul2 lemau, pergi sane main taiti ngn Ejal, Izzati, Helmi dan sorg kwn dier yg aku x ingt nama. but all of them are nice people, funny too. skali lagi aku balik dr Rasta tersenyum. next day aku ke sana lagi. tp pada masa yg berbeza, aku tgk Rasta pada waktu siang sbb nk browse around tgk Thread Zoo Bazaar. tlalu byk item on sale! FYI, this is a fashion bazaar. even though there was a lot of beautiful things, aku dan Teng x beli ape2. maybe bkn style kitorg kot. so, kami merayap ke The Curve, Cineleisure, Ikea dan Jusco, tp hanya beli kopi dan teh. lagi skali aku snyum pjg. hahahaha.

4. time kejadian nie, aku da pun tido. tp hakikat dr kejadian nie buat aku tersenyum. Chelsea menang against Arsenal 2-0. mmg indah.

5. dan chat box di tepi blog nie. encik jejaka misteri RxZ hitam, ko kelakar. buat aku snyum lagi. hahaha.

.education, it sucks, big time.

looks like ghost, tastes like ghost, feels like ghost

selamat pagi buta blog. kjp lagi suda mau subuh. pastu ade kelas Tesis dan kelas Contract Management. dua2 kelas pun aku ade nawaitu nak tuang. kurang ajar gile kn? bosan gak asyik jadi pelajar yang baik je sepanjang mase. kadang2, masuk kelas akn membuatkan aku rs lebih emo dan sakit jiwa dari buat kerja kat umah. mengadap plan Annexe nie mmg buat aku pening lalat. aku terbayang sape la arkitek gile yg buat drwg nie. dan sape la kontraktor hebat yg berjaya baca drwg gile nie. aku rs ade la anak arkitek mane2 yg contengkn drwg nie ntuk bapak dier. 

department aku skrg cukup suke politik. aku tatao ape yg influence diorg. kes Anwar ngn Shaiful kot? Shaiful Bukhari, tu name kwn aku a.k.a Jajai. tiap kali aku baca paper pasal kes maksiat dua lelaki nie, aku slalu ckp dlm ati, "mintak simpang la Jajai dari masuk paper pasal bnda cmni." hahaha. cukup susah bile lecturers pun da pandai nk berlagak antara satu sama lain, da pandai tunjuk gile kuasa, da pandai jadi nyanyuk. ats sebab2 demikian lah, aku rs design is not fun anymore. mintak maaf, aku mule x percaya education system di UiTM. 

minggu lepas, antara complains yg aku dgr : 

"KP a.k.a Ketua Program di dept AD rampas kad matriks sbb aku pakai selipar."

aku terbayang, nth brape ribu student AD yg pakai selipar pi kelas. rsnye ramai. aku bkn x pnh pi sane. kalu btul2 la nk kuatkuasa sahsiah rupe diri, sila la tahan para wanita yg bj serba serbi pendek dan oh, mnayang cleavage. tidak lupe juga mereka yg menjadi fashion disasters, kate pun dept AD adalah fashion heaven. buang lah students yg mnyakitkan biji mata di situ. aku bole bagi nama2 manusia yg terlibat jika mau.

truskan cerita: 

"aku x dapat buat validation. bile pi rujuk kt office, ppuan di office tu maki2, siap accuse aku x nk belajar kt sini da."

pergh. office worker ade courage nak maki student? siap ckp budak tu x nk belajar? amboi. system yg asyik down, salahkn student yg jadi mangsa keadaan? kalu la aku ade kt situ dan hati aku cukup kering, aku tala je dahi ppuan tu. da la kije x tinggi mane, mulut plak mm mintak stapler. mrh jgk aku ngn sistem IT UiTM nie. bkn mnyenangkan, mnyusahkan ade la. aku ingt aku amik masa setahun ntuk jumpa kt url pendaftaran stiker kereta. serius mntk kaki. bak kate Malee, fuck the system.

mngenangkan penahanan student kerana sahsiah rupe diri, aku teringat cerita seseorang. seseorang itu adalah A dan lecturer yg terlibat dalam cerita ini adalah Prof. B (B mewakili bangang, bukan best). kami student interior design, mmg cukup suke langgar peraturan sahsiah rupe diri. hobi kami. tapi besar sngt ke kesalahan memakai tshirt putih dan seluar jeans? tgk di sekeliling school, ramai gile yg pakai tshirt, selipar tandas, seluar jeans faded rabak dan muke x hensem. 

maka, nk jadikan cerita, Prof. B menahan A ats kesalahan di ats, siap bwk pi naik kat Dekan fakulti. Prof. B nie mmg terkenal sbb melampau pnye skema, teknikal kononnya dan khbr angin bahawa PhD nye adalah PhD yg dibeli. di office Dekan, si Prof. B nie cite la mcm2 kt dekan psl kslhan A. so, si Dekan pun suruh la Prof. B keluar dlu, kononnye nk slow talk sama A. bile je Prof. B keluar, Dekan bgtao A suh duduk diam2, lama2 sket dlm office tatkala Dekan kemas office dier smbil snyap x bercakap apa pd si A. ksian Prof. B, Dekan pun malas nak amik tao psl sikap skema ko tu....

oh azan Subuh pulak. sejuk kejap hati aku..

.kalu da minat...

nie gig photographer? da la pompuan, pakai baju kurung lak tu. gila ka?

da la ade niat nk tgk Raein dan Shikari datang Malaysia. tobat2 la sket ppuan oi.

.BxC at BOLD.

hello blog. updates on my life as a gig photographer. i read an article on a blog that i can't remember, about how he is annoyed with the fact that everyone claim themselves to be a photographer with their big bulky DSLRs. and how they only potray the beautiful skinny camwhoring models in their photos. he have his interest on a world war II war photographer and he loves the photowork for its unique subject matter. and gig is my kind of subject matter =)

let's see how Breakin' Chains was during the recent BOLD show in KL. =)

.mencari pasal.

hahahaha. i was too early to fly off from BOLD today. i have my reasons. sounds poyo but it is the truth anyway. i don't like people indicating me as a 'poser' yada yada by being there. 

truthfully, i don't know a thing about the band before Breakin' Chains was selected to perform on the same stage as theirs. i was once marked a 'poser' for my interest of going to the ENVY show even though i had only heard their songs like 2 or 3 times only and hardly remember their names. but what's the problem man? i know they are good. it was my choice to go or not. it's my choice to listen to them right before my eyes, with my own money to get the ticket. i didn't go to that show anyway. maybe that is why i set my revenge on going to MONO and Saosin's show in Kuala Lumpur this year. 

fuck what any of you want to say. even though i never heard of BOLD earlier, i got free pass to the show. go to hell with what you want to say. there is no such thing as a true hardcore fan, it is not even in you. 

kalu x perlu, x salah ntuk x ambil peduli. kn? x salah ntuk berubah. x salah ntuk tidak ambil kisah. x salah ntuk biarkan ianya jadi gagal. yang salah tetap bukan aku. so, snyum je lah.

.SAOSIN!!! i love you!.

at last, a dream came true!! on 1st of February 2010, i got the chance to get eye to eye with SAOSIN! the best post hardcore band in the world! i couldn't sleep all night, i was day dreaming in class that morning and i was thrilled to pick up Pjoel to go the venue at KL Live. luckily we were early, got the cheapest parking space in front of the venue. since it was just 530pm at that moment, Pjoel and i went to BB and Pavilion to kill the time. when we arrive at KL Live at 7pm, it was the best time to queue. met some new Sabahan friends in line, they came 13 all together from Sabah! we were lucky to be right in front of the stage. 

Love Me Butch and Saosin was fucking awesome! the music blew my sanity off!

Pjoel and I was lucky to get their tshirts and autographs. the best part was when Alex Rodriguez, the drummer of Saosin asked me about my tshirt. i was wearing the new MONO tshirt. he asked if i think that band was good and shared that he loved the band but never got the chance to see the Japanese band live. i told him that they were in KL a couple of days ago and the show was top ranked. =)

and as i was taking Cove Reber's signature at the end of the table, he kissed my cheecks! *scream!!!!!!!

 

a face telling : "i am ready to die satisfied" =D

the party people!

Saosin Limited Tour Tshirt, CD, Autograph and Memory. 

(photos from Sarah)

Saosin, you guys are extremely AWESOME!!!!!

(photos by me)

didn't bring along my DSLR, just an original Olympus dgcam

.i saw all that.

the sound, the light, the song and the story. the night felt so perfect. even thought it was a sea crowd of people, the feeling feels so isolated, the music took my heart out. i saw little girls holding on to red balloons, running through a yellowish green field. i saw a cliff and raging ocean waves hitting it on a night dark and terrifying. i saw fire burning with a delicate yellow. thanks MONO. 

.MONO, MONO, MONO at last!.

hey babe! feeling a hell of excitement now. just got home from MONO's show at KLpac. it was awesome! will try to upload the photos and write more next time =))

.back from Spore, awesome man.

back from i heart emoviolence show at Black Hole, Singapore with Virginia On Duty. extremely excited and exhausted. i heart you Singapore (despite of all those sucking moments) hahahaha!!

.グッドバイ.

hello friends. this is an emotional post. if this is not the kind of post you wouldn't like to read, skip this one.

dear friends, you know who you are, and i know you guys don't read much of my blog. maybe that is an advantage, i'm not full hearted on writing this on you guys. but patience have limitations. but i think you guys need to know. 

i am not needed. i have no importance. i wish i am able to be more selfish in giving attention to myself instead of to you. it's hard but i'll try. maybe you guys won't mind, not at all.

you guys are better off alone. you guys know how to make decisions. you guys know how to escape. you guys love making mistakes. you guys can't listen, don't want to listen.

i wish i am able to give the attention i have to some one else. those who wants to actually be friends. not someone who takes advantage on those who cares.

finding time to finally say i quit.